Barbara’s memoir looks deep into the complexities of growing up biracial, with a Japanese mother and an African American father. These two seemingly disparate worlds shaped her sense of self in profound ways, often pulling her in opposite directions, at times creating a tug-of-war within her soul. Barbara paints a vivid picture of this internal struggle, describing herself as a ‘swan on water,’ graceful and serene on the surface, but paddling like mad beneath the waterline.